Ten Major Irrational Beliefs
- I must have the love or approval from all people I find important.
- I must be thoroughly competent, adequate and achieving.
- People who act unfairly are bad, wicked or rotten individuals.
- Things are awful, terrible and catastrophic when I get seriously frustrated, treated unfairly or rejected.
- Emotional misery comes from external pressures and I have little ability to control or change my feelings.
- If something seems fearsome, I must think about it all the time and make myself cautious about it.
- It is easier to avoid or run away from many life difficulties and responsibilities rather than to be self-disciplined.
- My past remains all important and it has to keep determining my feelings and behaviours today.
- All things are horrible and awful if I don’t find good solutions to life’s
challenging realities. - I can achieve maximum happiness by inertia and inaction or by passively and uncommittedly “enjoying myself”.
Ten Major Rational Beliefs
- I don’t necessarily need love and approval to survive. It is most desirable to concentrate on self-acceptances and on loving instead of on being loved.
- It is more advisable to accept myself as an important human being with limitations and fallibilities. It is often better to do that than to do well.
- People often behave stupidly and unfairly, it would be better if they were helped to change their ways, rather than punishing or condemning them severely.
- While it is undesirable to fail to get what I want, it is seldom awful and intolerable.
- Because I contribute to my own emotional upsets, I can change them by thinking more rationally.
- Worrying will not make things disappear, I will do my best to deal with potentially stressful events and when this proves impossible, I will accept the inevitable.
- In the long run, the long and undisciplined way is less rewarding than is the longer range approach to pleasure and enjoyment.
- Continual rethinking of my old assumptions and reworking of my past can reduce the negative influences from my childhood and adolescence.
- Whether I like it or not, reality exists and I should learn to accept its existence before I start changing it.
- Getting involved in long term interesting tasks and activities will force me to act against my own inertia.
Source: Albert Ellis